06/18/2000 - FATHERS
Session Start: Sun Jun 18
20:38:05 2000 *** Now talking in #SpiritualPersistence.. *** Elissa changes topic to ' 2,4~ Tonight's 2,7Topic: 2,8"Fathers" 2,9Sunday 2,11June 18 0,12at 9pm 2,13EDT ~ 0,2Hosted by Rev. Dr. Randolph Becker & Elissa Bishop Becker (and Rikkity). URL: www.spiritualpersistence.com ' *** HyperBRB is now known as Hypernoodle *** WhiteTiger (whitetiger@***.door.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence *** fang (fang@***.cld.brightok.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence *** Jackie (ADCjava@***.ipt.aol.com) has joined #SpiritualPersistence *** lexylee (ADCjava@***.minden.la.ppp.wnonline.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence *** StF (fpriley@***.worldpath.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence RevRandy . . .OK - simmer down Hypernoodle . . .ok...done....being good for sure now RevRandy . . .take a seat Elissa . . .randy get down from there! WhiteTiger . . .cool! free furniture :) Hypernoodle . . .;) Elissa . . .rofl!!! RevRandy . . .no payment until 2002, nothing down WhiteTiger . . .lmao Elissa . . .do you have an internal furniture issue, wt? Hypernoodle . . .uhhh.....what is the interest rate? Elissa . . .o boy RevRandy . . .48.7% Hypernoodle . . .figures lol Elissa . . .gonna be one of those nights RevRandy . . .and it is solid knotty pine WhiteTiger . . .sure do Elissa... have a devil of a time passing the stuff Hypernoodle . . .I said I was going to be good! They won't let me! RevRandy . . .laminate Elissa . . .his back must be feeling better Elissa . . .you're a victim hyper... yeah.... sure RevRandy . . .OK - all seriousness aside - Hypernoodle . . .yes! That's it! RevRandy . . .it is time to start Elissa . . .again Hypernoodle . . .ok Elissa . . .ok! RevRandy . . .I'm a father -- be good to me tonight RevRandy . . .please RevRandy . . .pleaseeeeeee Elissa . . .you're sitting on top of me StF . . .((((RR))))) RevRandy . . .so RevRandy . . .Hey StF RevRandy . . .Hi, and welcome to SPIRITUAL PERSISTENCE, the chat room that asks the perennial question RevRandy . . .huh? Jackie . . .lol RevRandy . . .(I risk being a bit irreverent since we all seem to be familiar here --- or this familiars here) *** Pinky (Cassandraa@***.ns.sympatico.ca) has joined #SpiritualPersistence StF . . .It's gonna be a Loooonnngggg nite! RevRandy . . .so, let's be serious for a moment RevRandy . . .for our invocation RevRandy . . .join in the spirit of these words *** misumatt (ADCjava@***.ipt.aol.com) has joined #SpiritualPersistence RevRandy . . .May we be connected to all things loving RevRandy . . .Protected from all things evil RevRandy . . .and guided in all ways gracious. Blessed Be. *** rainbow (ADCjava@***.ipt.aol.com) has joined #SpiritualPersistence StF . . .amen Elissa . . .amen~ Jackie . . .amen fang . . .amen misumatt . . .amen WhiteTiger . . .aho Pinky . . .amen RevRandy . . .welcome misumatt and rainbow Elissa . . .welcome misumatt . . .ty Hypernoodle . . .amen Elissa . . .since today is father's day Elissa . . .we will do some thinking about what that role of father fang . . .yes sad day Elissa . . .means to us--both in a general sense Elissa . . .and in a personal sense. Elissa . . .yes it is sad for some. Elissa . . .it brings up many different feelings and thoughts in us, Elissa . . .so let's talk about what fathers mean to us personally for a while... Elissa . . .some of us had fathers who were loving, some did--or do--not, fang . . .love support a person we look up to Elissa . . .to some of us father means love or playfulness or support Elissa . . .or money or competition or gratitude Elissa . . .or discipline or forgiveness, Elissa . . .laughter or harsh words, Elissa . . .regrets and pain or happy memories and loss... Elissa . . .and for most of us the word "father" carries Elissa . . .with it and in it many levels of meaning. Elissa . . .our fathers are our protectors, our adventurers, our explorers, Elissa . . .our inventors and artists, misumatt . . .A father/Parent, is unconditional LOVE! They love us no matter what! I miss my dad and my son. Just want to send love to both of them. Thank you DAD for watching over and taking care of my precious son Matthew! misumatt . . .Night all Elissa . . .ok, i'd like us to name the person in our lives Elissa . . .who was/is father or father figure, Elissa . . .and to tell a bit about what that means to us. *** misumatt has quit IRC (QUIT: ) Elissa . . .so, i'll begin, and i won't call on anyone Elissa . . .but if you'd like to express your thoughts and feelings Elissa . . .please do. Elissa . . .Milton Kaufman, or "Papa", Elissa . . .my father, Rikkity's father figure, *** eleven (ADCjava@***.tnt1.martinsburg.wv.da.uu.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence Elissa . . .teacher, inventor, adventurer, playmate... Elissa . . .we had hard times emotionally but always ended Elissa . . .by forgiving each other and understanding a little better Elissa . . .what we meant to each other, and i will always love him and Elissa . . .remember his weird sense of humor :) Elissa . . .anyone else? WhiteTiger . . .Pop: decent, honorable, always did his duty, regardless what it cost him. Don't believe I ever saw him place himself before his family. Hypernoodle . . .How can one say bad of the dead....so I'll just say that my dad taught me some great lessons.....I am still learning Elissa . . .let's stop there for a minute... WhiteTiger . . .there are details, but they all amount to that first post, one way or another Elissa . . .the dead have told us that to not remember the bad along with the good Elissa . . .is to not remember the whole of who they were as people, and so is to make them less real in our lives. Elissa . . .end of lecture :) Hypernoodle . . .I remember....I know what I do not want to bring fear and anger to others fang . . .william h richardson my best friend, supporter of our family, my biggest supporter emotionally, even though he was working almost all the time fang . . .he was there for me, no matter what fang . . .he always put his family first also fang . . .and he did his duty also, during ww2 fang . . .back when duty,, honor, meant something eleven . . .that's so nice Elissa . . .eleven and stf? eleven . . .yes? Elissa . . .oooops said i wouldn't call on anyone lol WhiteTiger . . .lol Elissa . . .i just wanted to know if you'd like to share the meaning of your father with us eleven . . .my dad passed about 10 years ago...our relationship has grown in leaps and bounds since that time!!! Elissa . . .lol i understand WhiteTiger . . .lol eleven . . .love is much greater than proximity...in life and in death WhiteTiger . . .true :) Elissa . . .death can certainly give us perspective eleven . . .i used to feel so sad on father's dad...but no more! Elissa . . .and what was his name, eleven? eleven . . .jerry Elissa . . .ty Elissa . . .so our fathers seem to mean love and duty and support and friendship... Elissa . . .and some lessons we have learned and perhaps we would not have chosen eleven . . .absolutely Elissa . . .but let's move on now to some specific, memorable father friends in spirit RevRandy . . .OK - and here is where we get to follow Rikkity's instructions for the night eleven . . .ready... RevRandy . . .she suggested (or was that ordered) Elissa . . .we are here but to obey lol RevRandy . . .that we look to some of the "fathers" we have encountered through her * WhiteTiger suppresses the kneejerk RevRandy . . .and hear what they have said * Elissa is proud of wt WhiteTiger . . .lol RevRandy . . .so, I begin with one already mentioned: RevRandy . . . 0,2Papa: RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"Hey babe, it's been a while but I've been busy. Don's good. Boy, can that RevRandy . . . 0,2guy fly. He takes me up in jets and I take him up in props, but I can do RevRandy . . . 0,2things he can't--like fly with no engine. Work is great but I don't have RevRandy . . . 0,2much time for it. The beach season is now and forever. Who could have RevRandy . . . 0,2thought. It's great all right, and no taxes. RevRandy . . . RevRandy . . . 0,2"I'm feeling free. The whole universe is ahead. Remember when you were a kid RevRandy . . . 0,2and everything seems possible. Well here it is. And it is there, too, but RevRandy . . . 0,2few can see it once they grow up. We lose the language of childhood, which RevRandy . . . 0,2is the language of dreams. Many arrive here with no memory of those images RevRandy . . . 0,2and tools, so people like me have to give them voices. RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"Believe, trust, dream. Do live and enjoy. Don't make life a task but RevRandy . . . 0,2experience it as a path of joy. If you can't see a beckoning horizon, change RevRandy . . . 0,2your point of view." (5/14/96 - W#34) RevRandy . . .Ok - some great and tough advice - RevRandy . . .about what we may have lost along the way to becoming adults RevRandy . . .a sense of what is possible - everything, so to speak RevRandy . . .or it seems possible RevRandy . . .for in the dream of possibility is the seed of actuality RevRandy . . .I especially like the last paragraph RevRandy . . . 0,2"Believe, trust, dream. Do live and enjoy. Don't make life a task but RevRandy . . . 0,2experience it as a path of joy. If you can't see a beckoning horizon, change RevRandy . . . 0,2your point of view." (5/14/96 - W#34) StF . . .Can I have his name, please, so I can "quote" the last sentence??? Love it! Elissa . . .that's Papa, stf WhiteTiger . . .it IS all possible... but ya pay for what ya get, which is the sticking point for most folks, imo RevRandy . . .but if you believe in abundance, then no price is too high, because you always have all the resources (love, hope, faith) you need Elissa . . .well, everything is a 2-way street... whether you pay is a matter of what your perspective is WhiteTiger . . .mmm... depends what ya mean by "abundance" RevRandy . . .yet most settle for images of scarcity instead - and won't pay the price they fear will be asked RevRandy . . .is it that we have to pay the price, or we fear we may have to pay a price beyond our means Elissa . . .wt can you say more about what you mean by "pay" WhiteTiger . . .sure... being rich is no big hassle... all it takes is devotion and time and energy invested... but most will hang around waiting for the lotto, and griping StF . . .These are the things my dad taught me...that I struggle with still...attitudes that make me angry WhiteTiger . . .same with most anything else, imo StF . . .and the anger creates the attitude...convoluted..circular..thinking that gets you no where RevRandy . . .are you saying people want cheap grace instead of achieved goals Elissa . . .ah i see, you mean expectations fang . . .i believe in abundance, but it still eludes me WhiteTiger . . .pretty much, RR... "I'm here, I'm breathing, where are the goodies I'm owed" seems to be way popular StF . . .Personally, I feel that I have learned that Personal Responsibility is the missing link WhiteTiger . . .bravo, StF :) RevRandy . . .inheritance versus achievement Elissa . . .o yes, stf! Elissa . . .it's a sense of something being missing, i believe, and not knowing what that is... or focusing on material things expecting them to fill spiritual needs *** karen (ADCjava@***.ipt.aol.com) has joined #SpiritualPersistence fang . . .hey i'm trying but can't find a job StF . . .no, fang..dont get me wrong... WhiteTiger . . .hi karen :) StF . . .I mean, "stuff happens"...and we do each create our own world.. karen . . .hi white tig StF . . .To not blame everyone and everything else is the key... RevRandy . . .don't mistake material things (job, house, money) with the other elements of life (fulfillment, sharing, etc) Elissa . . .yes, that's a big one Elissa . . .(the not blaming and personal responsibility) StF . . .Saying that that is what my dad did,,, still does... and not a good lesson WhiteTiger . . .those things too, are choices we make for ourselves, RR... at least it looks that way to me Elissa . . .blaming keeps us stuck and not dealing with our own stuff Elissa . . .so of course it's easier to do RevRandy . . .blaming is looking backwards - which is no way to look if we want to get to the future karen . . .I have a wonderful father...my whole life he was there, quiet and just good that is why these past 10 years he has my devotion after a stroke Elissa . . .blaming is looking outside ourselves for what we need to be creating within and for ourselves Elissa . . .that's wonderful, karen eleven . . .yes, karen that is awesome... StF . . .sorry...wasnt going to speak tonight..dont mind me... Elissa . . .stf, i think you bring up important issues so please don't apologize... karen . . .I have been given endless blessing to be at his side in several hospital settings and took care of him for about 4 years WhiteTiger . . .looking backwards isn't all bad, RR. "those who don't learn from the past are doomed to repeat it"... a bit of retro-reflection can be very beneficial eleven . . .karen...your dad still living? RevRandy . . .but the issue is focus - WT - learning means that we know it and don't need to look back any more WhiteTiger . . .point taken... but "experienced" and "known" aren't necessarily synonymous karen . . .yes...I visit this wonderful man in a nursing home...about 5 times a week karen . . .love kicking butt there eleven . . .you are so fortunate...treasure every minute! karen . . .I sure do treasure this man RevRandy . . .karen - i hear you speaking of giving --- which is different from feeling that things are taken RevRandy . . .that is good karen . . .sure...giving has no borders RevRandy . . .abundance karen . . .and it leaves you more filled RevRandy . . .well, here's another visitor to our pondering RevRandy . . . 0,2GW: RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"I was talking about regrets, and the one that comes to mind is slavery. We RevRandy . . . 0,2 0,2know so little in our lifetimes of the larger vision. We do what seems right RevRandy . . . 0,2and just. But I say this to your time: Those who would spend their energy on RevRandy . . . 0,2discrediting us for our ancient faults will probably be remembered for RevRandy . . . 0,2failing to confront the issues of their own time. RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"It's easy to solve history's problems, but hard to solve one's own. Mr. RevRandy . . . 0,2Jefferson, Mr. Monroe, Mr. Franklin and all the rest, they dealt with their RevRandy . . . 0,2time and thus created a future. Those who deal with the past create a past RevRandy . . . 0,2but not a future, and surely not a reality. As your EB would say, ponder RevRandy . . . 0,2that." (6/30/96 - W#43) karen . . .my dad is no man of great importance...sweet, simple, kind and former soldier RevRandy . . .well, here's a theme again RevRandy . . .about how we focus our energy and attention RevRandy . . .and the issue of RevRandy . . .vision RevRandy . . .and when we focus our energy on what has been RevRandy . . .and on the failure of personalities of the past RevRandy . . .we rob our potential to have vision RevRandy . . .of the future RevRandy . . .But, what say you about GW's words? WhiteTiger . . .seems to me it's a simple matter of choosing to look farther than "what's in it for me"... karen . . .well all of this caring for both parents has taken some toll...hope I can finish with some of these worldly issues..but with me people come first Elissa . . .that isn't always simple, wt... first we have to know something about who "me" is WhiteTiger . . .that's the trick isn't it Elissa? knowing the diff twixt "me" and "not me" Elissa . . .that sure is, wt :) RevRandy . . .I do have concerns about those who want to do revisionist history RevRandy . . .to show from the past RevRandy . . .that there is a foundation for their issue in the present RevRandy . . .as if that will make it more valid RevRandy . . .when I keep asking if what I am doing in the present is a proper foundation for what I envision for the future fang . . .that's kind of like the white supremicists, if they looked into their geneology they'd find there are really no true whites imo Elissa . . .yes fang fang . . .we're all really mixed breeds :) Pinky . . .yes WhiteTiger . . .lol RevRandy . . .indeed - so next time you get the question on a form, check other, and write in mixed Elissa . . .definitely, but we identify with externals instead of internals WhiteTiger . . .{-- heinz 57 Elissa . . .we identify with race, nationality, religion, etc. and look to those things fang . . .even dogs were made of different breeds way back when Elissa . . .to give us a sense of who we are instead Elissa . . .of finding out who we are as unique beings in the world... Elissa . . .which is much harder to do and takes a lot of work fang . . .i look white, but am native american, german, and still working on it karen . . .well...dear understanding and kind ones....I enjoy the chat...and am appreciative of your time...have a sweet niece here..she needs some hugs. Hypernoodle . . .:) Elissa . . .and also usually takes a good number of lives RevRandy . . .be well karen karen . . ..and hugs to you...especially compassionate Elissa Elissa . . .nite karen, come again eleven . . .love to you and dad karen!! Elissa . . .((((((karen)))))) fang . . .give her hugs from us all karen RevRandy . . .I notice by my great-grandfather's clock that it is time for a breeeaaaakkkkkk karen . . .;-) felt preety good...ahhhh *** karen has quit IRC (QUIT: ) RevRandy . . .back in about 10 -- but keep on chatting!!!! Elissa . . .bbbbbbbrrrrrrreeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaakkkkkkkkkk *** Boggs (ADCjava@***.nad.adelphia.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence RevRandy . . .OK - back to serious stuff, and more from the other side RevRandy . . .ready? eleven . . .yep Elissa . . .yep fang . . .yep RevRandy . . . 0,2TJ: RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"And a good morning to you all. Rikkity has asked me to speak about RevRandy . . . 0,2community and vision. You wondered about how the colonies could arise as one RevRandy . . . 0,2mass against the yoke of Britain. We had two powerful agents: community and RevRandy . . . 0,2vision. RevRandy . . . RevRandy . . . 0,2"Too often people believe that community is based on proximity. We are in RevRandy . . . 0,2community, they say, with those around us. But I ask you to consider your RevRandy . . . 0,2own experience. Have you not seen a Greek, for example, who meets for the RevRandy . . . 0,2first time another Greek. They live miles apart, but they sense community. RevRandy . . . 0,2This is because community is different from society and culture. Community RevRandy . . . 0,2is that circle in which we eat or partake in common, but it need not be just RevRandy . . . 0,2those at our table. My brothers in Connecticut tasted the same meal of fraud RevRandy . . . 0,2and oppression as I. If I were to travel as a blind man within these RevRandy . . . 0,2colonies, I would scarce know where I was but for the accents--the meat of RevRandy . . . 0,2the conversations being so much in common. We always need to sense the RevRandy . . . 0,2largest community of which we are a part; and if we look only to those at RevRandy . . . 0,2our table, we will have neglected the larger good. RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"But no community ever really exists without vision. A group going nowhere RevRandy . . . 0,2or backwards is but a mob; a group going forward is a community, for a real RevRandy . . . 0,2community is always about growth, development, and ideals. Communities that RevRandy . . . 0,2seek the status quo, they are prisons, not communities--prisons of souls. RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"And a good holiday season to you, whatever be your holiday or season." RevRandy . . . 0,2(12/12/97 - W#82) RevRandy . . .I want to focus on two points in this passage RevRandy . . .We always need to sense the largest community of which we are a part RevRandy . . .and RevRandy . . .No community ever really exists without vision. RevRandy . . .This call to our universality is striking to me - for so often the call is to loyalty of a smaller nature RevRandy . . .to specific family or clan RevRandy . . .nationality or creed RevRandy . . .race or philosophy RevRandy . . .when we all participate in a commonality that is greater than any of those parts RevRandy . . .why settle for the littler contexts when the grander ones await -- RevRandy . . .doesn't it make sense that if we truly believe that we are all part of the great creative movement of all creation RevRandy . . .that we would seek to be closer to that oneness, rather than isolate ourselves away from it RevRandy . . .in particulars? RevRandy . . .And then, the concept of community being impossible without vision RevRandy . . .a shared sense of the motion and the direction RevRandy . . .of those who have seen a commonality RevRandy . . .that only as one experiences motion with a group does one know if one is part of that group, or merely a spectator RevRandy . . .watching it go by. RevRandy . . .At least that is what I see in this. what about you? eleven . . .there is so much to say here...each time i try to say it...i realize i need more time and space!!! RevRandy . . .ok - take the time Elissa . . .that focusing narrowly is counter-productive to the greater good. Elissa . . .we shoot ourselves in the foot, so to speak, when we look for meaning in small circles WhiteTiger . . .mmmmm... seems to me one important measure of "maturity" is just how much larger one's place of devotion is than one's self... self, community, nation, race... ad infinitum eleven . . .well, i have been pondering losses and the truly needless sense of feeling such losses because of our connection to the whole and our community... RevRandy . . .one of the key understandings of Spiritual Persistence is that in our growth to greater complexity we will, in future combination RevRandy . . .often connect with those who might seem quiet alien to us now (hello alien) RevRandy . . .eleven - interesting - can you say some more Elissa . . .yes, please say more eleven . . .in particular mothers/parents who lose their children...such an unbearable thought. if i can connect with their pain after such a horrible loss, then why can they not connect with the LOVE that is clearly existent for all living children? eleven . . .i don't know if i can adequately describe this. StF . . .Sometimes it's a matter of choice.... eleven . . .just trying so hard to heal that wound that i feel so deeply for others. i share my living baby as the daughter of all StF . . .the pain of loss is a natural consequence of human life.. StF . . .but the decision to stay within the grief longer than necessary is a choice Elissa . . .nicely put, stf StF . . .but for everyone the time it takes is their journey.. WhiteTiger . . .I guess I'm just way out of step... to me grief is plainly self pity... never been able to do that fang . . .the pain is sometimes all you have left RevRandy . . .yes, StF - different for each StF . . .and we need to be compassionate as fellow travelers with them Elissa . . .loss can be helped by focusing on the abundance in our communities, eleven, but we each have to do our own work WhiteTiger . . .even the buzz word denotes it, to me... "loss"... "what I had, I no longer have"... self interest fang . . .have your parents passed on yet wt? eleven . . .yes,, i know. just trying to deal with fear based thoughts. RevRandy . . .WT - it seems to me IMHO that the process of grief work is a movement through that self-interest back to a larger world view WhiteTiger . . .Pop is gone, StF... as is my daughter Elissa . . .wt, loss can often destroy someone's identity... many of us in grief has used that experience to transform ourselves... Elissa . . .it can be self-pity but it can also be rebirth Elissa . . .but the work it takes to get there is awesome and scary HyperBRB . . .to me it was a path to face reality fang . . .amen elissa WhiteTiger . . .probably Elissa, from what I have seen... just never been there myself... I have a weird perspective on the whole "death" issue *** HyperBRB is now known as Hypernoodle RevRandy . . .WT- for me, after Ericka's death, it was not a matter of pity or guilt as much as questions - profound questions, about the meaning and nature of everything WhiteTiger . . .wb Dudette ;) StF . . .well, we are all multi level beings... Hypernoodle . . .thanks ;) Elissa . . .many who have not dealt with death and grief are in denail about it, and our culture encourages and reinforces that denial RevRandy . . .denail? WhiteTiger . . .denail? is that like a pedicure? *G* eleven . . .yes, revrandy THAT'S what i was trying to say Elissa . . .yeah, denail Hypernoodle . . .de means un.....so un nail RevRandy . . .the check is in denail WhiteTiger . . .lol RR StF . . .we have intellectual understanding...and varying levels of emotional fang . . .{------------fang is the denial queen RevRandy . . .yes - the experience meant not only questions but hard work -- and a sense of losing more than just Ericka - losing as well the world as I knew it - but through the process of grief finding the world as it is more deeply Hypernoodle . . .Can I say something? Elissa . . .please hyper! Elissa . . .no need to ask permission here Hypernoodle . . .I always thought of death as a way to get a step closer to eternal life Hypernoodle . . .I never grieved for anyone in my life who died Hypernoodle . . .Until Nikki was born...... WhiteTiger . . .boy, I dunno about that one, StF... emotion, as I see it, is a response to a stimulus... don't see how that amounts to "understanding" Hypernoodle . . .knowing they only gave her 5 years at the most to live changed my perspective to that selfish state StF . . .exactly...WT Hypernoodle . . .I didn't want to get too close because I knew what it would mean to lose her *** sandee (ADCjava@***.auis.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence Elissa . . .yes, many of us began our spiritual searching with a death... it makes us look for meaning Hypernoodle . . .She is still with me though ...... which is wonderful Hypernoodle . . .But I have only grieved once StF . . .But emotion is very much a human condition...that we need to learn from Hypernoodle . . .And that was to let someone I loved make the decision to take his own life Hypernoodle . . .That one was hard fang . . .my parents were my whole life, trying to learn how to live without them has been a processs RevRandy . . .very hard Hyper - I can imagine Elissa . . .o hyper, that must have been very hard! Hypernoodle . . .I wanted to stop him Elissa . . .it is a process, not a task eleven . . .yes, rev. i am trying to think of ways to understand and accept what could be perceived as the worst loss (that of a child). by connecting with the whole we gain strength to handle all things. i send THAT healing energy out each night in meditation. Hypernoodle . . .But I knew I could not watch him every second Hypernoodle . . .So it was a choice to let him make his own decision Hypernoodle . . .But my Nikki is still with me :) fang . . .but it's like when another friend dies, it compounds the original issue fang . . .or when one of my dogs die, or i have to put them down Elissa . . .letting go is very hard... we need to let others make their own mistakes RevRandy . . .there is a need, in faith, to risk connecting enough that letting go is painful -- but to do less is to miss out on life with connection and meaning WhiteTiger . . .eleven- when my daughter died, to me, all that changed was the means of expression of the love... the tie remains... all that is "lost" is the physical expression Hypernoodle . . .RR? eleven . . .it seems we so easily can identify and label PAIN-because we focus on it and hear about it on the news...why not tap into the opposite. Elissa . . .((((((wt)))))) i didn't know your daughter died Hypernoodle . . .we were so connected that I had a tear appear in the roof of my mouth in the exact place where the bullet entered him eleven . . .WT that it so wonderful to hear you say that///that's what i want to hear more of!!! WhiteTiger . . .years ago, Elissa... lost her to SIDS, at just under one yr old fang . . .i wonder if my parents sheltered me so, since i was last child, fang . . .and they had lost 3 before me Elissa . . .o i'm sorry... you had so little of her and that kind of loss is not acknowledged in our culture... people say stupid things like "well, you can have another child" RevRandy . . .I think all of us would hope that we could get to a place where we can sense that it is transition and transformation, and not loss eleven . . .i don't know if i could find the strength that you have WT- should i be faced that. RevRandy . . .people find strength they never know they had - through what would seem to be unbearable circumstance fang . . .yes but the loss of the physical is very important in our culture Hypernoodle . . .Tiger and Nikki are a good pair :) WhiteTiger . . .shrug . . .Barbie is well and content where she is... that is enough for me eleven . . .i felt that peace when my grandmother died. Elissa . . .eleven, you're right that it's helpful to focus on what we've gained or have instead of on loss... fang . . .if we were all buddhists, i bet we'd see it differently Elissa . . .but first we need to know what we've lost and what it means to us eleven . . .how so? WhiteTiger . . .lol fang RevRandy . . .maybe some of us are, fang StF . . .but its not until ppl come to the understanding for THEMSELVES that the "Pain" is lessened fang . . .i need to learn more about it Hypernoodle . . .I can't understand why there is more pain in some instances than in others? RevRandy . . .all the theories in the world do not soothe the midnights of the soul Elissa . . .yes stf Elissa . . .hyper, because every relationship, every person, and every loss is different and unique WhiteTiger . . .degree of connection, I think hyper StF . . .I think, like WT said, maybe it IS selfish...but we dont understand that at the "place" that we happen to be at that moment StF . . .And so the "Pain" IS very real... StF . . .Until we come to a different understanding fang . . .i think that christianity was an effort to control the masses when we came over from britain imho Hypernoodle . . .I was happy when Mother went.....I could see her with angel wings zipping through the traffic :) Hypernoodle . . .She had gotten so frail here Elissa . . .if we learn and grow from the loss, that's what important i think RevRandy . . .(fang - don't get me started on organized religion and its role in keeping the status quo) *** kath (kcade@***.245.201.244.Houston1.Level3.net) has joined #SpiritualPersistence fang . . .ok RevRandy . . .hey kath kath . . .:) Elissa . . .hey kath! fang . . .think it stifles people though kath . . .((Rev)) StF . . .oh my goodness!! and THIS from a minister!!!! lol kath . . .((E)) fang . . .spiritualist minister WhiteTiger . . .lol Elissa . . .an irreverent reverend RevRandy . . .yep - but I am part of a disorganized religion Hypernoodle . . .lol WhiteTiger . . .they all are RR... you just know it, is all *G* RevRandy . . .OK - one last PtoP for the night - from one of my personal favorite friends from over there RevRandy . . . 0,2MCP: RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"Hello-a. When I was-a boys-a they call it Geno but hey-a we call it-a RevRandy . . . 0,2Genoa. You know-a what-a. That LD is a big piece-a work. I like-a him. He RevRandy . . . 0,2makes my head-a hurt. So I need-a bigger hats-a. He's deep and so am I. I RevRandy . . . 0,2speak-a in your-a tongue. Near-a your tongue. Ok, like-a your tongue-a RevRandy . . . 0,2would-a speak if she be-a mine. RevRandy . . . RevRandy . . . 0,2"Why do some people travel and others fear travel. I tell you. When we RevRandy . . . 0,2travel we open ourselves to the greater possibility of meeting more often RevRandy . . . 0,2the various components of our being-to-be. We expand our spiritual horizons. RevRandy . . . 0,2We accept complex possibilities. But when one fears travel, one fears RevRandy . . . 0,2oneself and what might, across lives, be the reality. The wider the horizons RevRandy . . . 0,2of a person, the greater the complexity imagined; and if you need to have RevRandy . . . 0,2complexity of 8 to move on, and the world you limit yourself to is always 4 or RevRandy . . . 0,2less, hey you'll be here a long time and many lives. Stuck. RevRandy . . . 0,2 RevRandy . . . 0,2"And remember those people of your time who thought that drugs were mind RevRandy . . . 0,2expanding, ha. We laugh at them, since all they did was expand inside a RevRandy . . . 0,2single life's brain and did nothing to push horizons to include others. They RevRandy . . . 0,2were journeys deep within but going nowhere. Just like if you read only one RevRandy . . . 0,2type of literature, you only meet the same characters with different names. RevRandy . . . 0,2So to move on we must also dare moving out. Or you would end up marrying RevRandy . . . 0,2your sister--or the spiritual equivalent, which is what most people do. It RevRandy . . . 0,2can take many lives, but time is irrelevant. And now with time irrelevant RevRandy . . . 0,2she says time's up. So, I go-a. Prego." (8/27/99 - W#144) WhiteTiger . . .like that phrase: " did nothing to push horizons to include others"... to me that is what love is, the inclusion of another within one's sense of self fang . . .prego???sounds like spaghetti sauce :) Elissa . . .o i like that, wt :) Elissa . . .lol fang Elissa . . .prego means thank you RevRandy . . .so, what do you see here - other than pasta sauce fang . . .you can tell fang is hungry ;) WhiteTiger . . .remedial math, perhaps? StF . . .I'm enjoying the vision of E channeling this one! Elissa . . .fang needs food :) fang . . .that we have to expand our horizons or we'll be stuck in a rut? Elissa . . .he is fun, stf! RevRandy . . .we do this together - and it does become fun-a kath . . .hmmm, eventually we will all join together, its only a matter of how much time we wish to take to get there kath . . .so why not enjoy the journey RevRandy . . .yep - kath - all working toward an ultimate inclusion RevRandy . . .of our persistent spirits kath . . .the longer it takes the more we may end up bringing with us, i mean in terms of intensity of experience WhiteTiger . . .mmmm... in at least one aspect, we're already all joined... there is one ultimate commonality we share, imo Elissa . . .yes, kath, and if we stay in our cozy armchairs we will not learn all we could about ourselves and we will limit our possibilities RevRandy . . .WT - that is the dilemma - we are ultimate part of all-that-is, and yet we remain only a part of it, and not one-with-it Elissa . . .yes wt, but knowing that intellectually and feeling/living it spiritually are very different WhiteTiger . . .:) that's not a dilemma, that's a truism LOL eleven . . .i've always thought of organized religion as a "cozy armchair"!!! lol RevRandy . . .or padded pew Elissa . . .i agree eleven eleven . . .;) Elissa . . .as is any small exclusionary circle WhiteTiger . . .hmmmmmmm Elissa . . .or squiggle... or polygon kath . . .even when i "think" i am experiencing the "darkness kath . . . it is almost comical kath . . .cause that's kath . . .it it is opening to that which is unknown RevRandy . . .the biggest challenge is to be open to that which is not yet familiar WhiteTiger . . .how does that differ from a small inclusionary circle, Elissa? Elissa . . .if the circle is small, there is no difference that i can see, wt RevRandy . . .one focuses on what is not within, and the other focuses on what is within -- may have the same result - but the focus can be different WhiteTiger . . .lol... trick Q... exclusion can only hold steady state at best... inclusion leaves endless option for forward movement *G* RevRandy . . .KKK worries about those outside their circle; DAR worries about who is in the circle Elissa . . .ok, i get it... sheeesh you're making me think here! kath . . .we are all one kath . . .concentric circle eleven . . .deep stuff........................... kath . . .spiral if you will kath . . .there is no outside kath . . .nor inside RevRandy . . .the center will not hold --- AAAAAAAYyyyyyyyyeeeeeee WhiteTiger . . .cool kath... can I hold $20 of "our" money? *G* Elissa . . .inclusionary is good, no matter what the size... it contains within it the potential for growth kath . . .you can try WT, but that 20 is ever moving WhiteTiger . . .lmao Elissa . . .hahahahahaha RevRandy . . .there are always more 20s --- in an abundant universe kath . . .my number is 30 kath . . .just to throw WT off a bit Hypernoodle . . .lol RevRandy . . .Send kath all of your $30 bills WhiteTiger . . .that there are RR... all it takes is doing what it takes to corner 'em ;) kath . . .LOL WhiteTiger . . .lol RR Hypernoodle . . .Wonder what you can buy with a $30? RevRandy . . .corner, rope, brand, and send them to the slaughter house kath . . .eternity Hypernoodle . . .:) RevRandy . . .how long is a piece of eternity? StF . . .one moment WhiteTiger . . .'bout 20 years vacation, last time I heard RevRandy . . .or eternal StF . . .this moment kath . . .yep kath . . .kernal in this moment RevRandy . . .this moment which holds in itself all the moments of now and all time at once Elissa . . .this moment which contains all that is and all that is possible kath . . .yes StF . . .thanks for the reminder :) kath . . .amen RevRandy . . .and all that is not possible? kath . . .amen WhiteTiger . . .I dunno... what I "see" says that what is, IS... time is a fiction we se to whittle it down small enough we can cope with it a bit at a time kath . . .oh well, our minds are rather small, makes sense really RevRandy . . .we should do a whole session on time StF . . .yup, wt..it's all a matter of focus RevRandy . . .if we had the time Elissa . . .time is a way for us "little brains" to deal with eternity Elissa . . .we have, randy... several of them lol WhiteTiger . . .StF :) kath . . .lol kath . . .why take the time RevRandy . . .keeps everything from happening at once RevRandy . . .(which it does anyway) kath . . .just know WhiteTiger . . ."we dip our cups at the seashore, but never have more than a cupful at a time" eleven . . .ok---strange, i had a premonition that we would talk about time about 10 minutes ago... kath . . .ah dippin my cup at the seashore Elissa . . .cool eleven kath . . .that evokes longing within me StF . . .but the sea is abundant :) WhiteTiger . . .ewwwwwwwwwwww... seawater tastes AWFUL Elissa . . .lol kath . . .WT, dip the cup, don't drink of it Elissa . . .but feels wonderful! Hypernoodle . . .lol....kath didn't say she was gonna drink it kath . . .LOL RevRandy . . .water, water everywhere, and o the boards did shrink; water, water everywhere and not a drop to drink kath . . .i wish my tears could flow Elissa . . .so the fathers we have talked about tonight are those who have led us toward the future we now experience... RevRandy . . .(sorry about this albatross on my neck) WhiteTiger . . .kath- I drink of the cup before me ;) kath . . .(((WT))) Elissa . . .i'd like to thank them for that on this day... thank you GW, MCP, TJ, and Papa RevRandy . . .yes - thank you guys - * WhiteTiger emails RR a fine albatross recipe... very good with a few capers RevRandy . . .ty kath . . .(((hugs to all SP supporters))))) *** lostangel (ADCjava@142.176.111.***) has joined #SpiritualPersistence eleven . . .love to all of you and those great dads out there... RevRandy . . .now, we need to share some SP news Elissa . . .((((((((hugs to our inclusionary circle)))))))))) make it be ever-expanding eleven . . .;) WhiteTiger . . .yer puttin in a jacuzzi? kath . . .kewl RevRandy . . .we will not be here for the next two Sundays (June 25 and July 2) StF . . .bummer!!! Elissa . . .right wt... that's the ticket RevRandy . . .but will return on July 9 WhiteTiger . . .bummer RevRandy . . .(this here Revs going out of town) kath . . .oke, then i guess i'll go on vacation also StF . . .but if they work hard, the jacuzzi could be in! Hypernoodle . . .that is okay, Tiger......I'll find something for you to do here ;) WhiteTiger . . .lmao RevRandy . . .I like that jacuzzi idea kath . . .yeh but, if i'm not in the jacuzzi with them, who cares WhiteTiger . . .should I dcc ya a cushion to put on the rail, RR? *EG* kath . . .LOL Elissa . . .lol you'll survive... just think of all the pondering you can do! RevRandy . . .;-) eleven . . .none of you guys are seeing me in a bikini kath . . .we survived before we will again eleven . . .;) Elissa . . .lol kath . . .the "b" word WhiteTiger . . .lmao kath RevRandy . . .o eleven - you look good eleven . . .thank you ---so do you! RevRandy . . .merci Elissa . . .randy in a bikini... hmmmmm kath . . .LOL WhiteTiger . . ."the wrappings and the package got nothing to do with the contents" StF . . .lol kath . . .randy in a bikini kath . . .oh man RevRandy . . .so, with that we wish you all a great span of light and life WhiteTiger . . .have fun on yer excursion, RR :) StF . . .yes, ENJOY!!! RevRandy . . .thanks - Nashville, Boston, upstate NY Hypernoodle . . .take care and night all :) Elissa . . .so have a great 2 weeks, guys... see you on july 9 when we'll talk about "Doubt" *** Hypernoodle (hypernoodl@***.door.net) has left #SpiritualPersistence RevRandy . . .I doubt we are going to talk about that Elissa . . . 7,0!Elissa rainbow.mid 0,7 :o) RevRandy . . .be well all WhiteTiger . . .I'm not sure I can handle that one, Elissa StF . . .Blessings...and God's Peace... StF . . .nite. kath . . .(((StF)))) *** StF (fpriley@***.worldpath.net) has left #SpiritualPersistence WhiteTiger . . .hasta la byebye, folks :) RevRandy . . .nite all *** RevRandy (bishopbeck@***.lft.widomaker.com) has left #SpiritualPersistence eleven . . .bye! fang . . .night all *** fang (fang@***.cld.brightok.net) has left #SpiritualPersistence Elissa . . .nite and love to all of you! Session Close: Sun Jun 18 23:09:56 2000 |
Last
Update: 5/18/2013
Web Author: the Rev Dr Randolph and
Elissa Bishop Becker, M.Ed., LPC, NCC
Copyright ©1999-2013 by the Rev Dr Randolph and Elissa Bishop
Becker, M.Ed.
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